After the winter, God gives us flowers

Yesterday we received a beautiful letter from Joel's birth mom. She sent us pictures from her wedding!

She graduated from college a while back and is now in grad school, working with other birth moms. She has chosen to be a social worker! We are so proud of her.

Joel's birth families feel like extended family to us. We love each of them and being able to see them annually and exchange news and photos through email in-between has been a real blessing to us, to them and to Joel.

I have many of those captured "video memories" from our visits... of Joel and his birth dad playing together on the playground... Joel getting his first haircut from his grandma and then his birth dad getting one from her (his mom) too. Parts of a beautiful day, impressed forever on my memory.

Some people may not know that there are feelings of guilt for the parties on both sides of adoption. My husband and I are awed at the courage it takes for birth parents to place their child in adoption. It takes courage and love that's taller than a mountain, deeper than the sea to give your baby to someone else to parent. That birth parent then wonders about his/her child... is she happy? Is he being loved and taken care of? Did I do the right thing? Joel's birth mom assures me that she has had no regrets because she feels we were right for her son. She thanks us! This helps me immeasurably to know of her feelings, because I often sit in wonder watching my little ones... staring at their beautiful faces, tears flowing, feeling joy at their funny personalities and sweet smiles... and feeling very guilty that we have them, but their birth parents don't. I want their birth families to know them.

I wish each of our adoption situations were as open as this first one. We have experienced that something potentially painful can blossom into a beautiful relationship. I want each of the birth family members to know how much I love and appreciate them! And it really does help Joel and will be more important to him as the years go by. He's a fantastic little boy and we love him like crazy! I am so glad we can share him with others who will also love him forever.